Archive for July, 2005
Quest For Learning
Everyone has their obsessions, or more politely, areas of focus. Mine is learning everything there is to know about human behavior and thought process, more specifically, my own. My social ineptitude anxieties coupled with my curiousity has made me my own test subject. As a Libra, I'm blessed with the gift of impartiality (I hope), so we'll see how it goes…
Lately, I'm conscentrating on what I call 'the precise moment.' I want to know the exact second a broad scale decision was finalized (not something trivial like what to have for lunch) and what was 'the last straw' that finally forced it. (I say finally because it is usually a culmination of things that impacts my choices.) For example, for as long as I can remember, I've known I do not want children. Even when I was playing with barbies or playing house, babies were never part of it. Even if I was playing with a doll, it was always my sister, never my child. I know the basic whys- vanity, fear of pain, unwillingness to change my lifestyle, but I want to know when I decided and what it was that influenced that choice.
I also seek the same answers where my depression is concerned. “When/how/why did it make the jump from run of the mill blues to clinical and debilitating?” I guess I'm one of those Scientology-esque nuts that believes in the power of the mind, that you can heal yourself. You have to know yourself (and trust yourself) inside and out, then it's trial and error to see what works best for you.
Heh, I think I'd be well suit for a career as a shrink. Other than the obvious 'I know what you're going through, because I've been there too' expertise, I am a great listener, I ask all the right questions, my personality is such that people feel compelled to open up to me. I give good advice (too bad I can't follow my own!) But for now, I am my own fascinating case study!
Man, am I sick! When I came home ill from work yesterday my temperature was 103.9! I took some Nyquil (it tastes like Jagermeister!) and stayed in bed from 5pm last night until 1pm today. I'm at about 101 now. Thanks to eye8trogdor who was kind of enough to bring me supplies. I feel good enough to sit up, but not to stand up long enough for a shower quite yet (and, boy, do I want to!) I have a book to read too, thankfully. I finished my new layout, which I'll put up in August, and uploaded some pre-move in pics of my new place. I *have* to go to work tomorrow, even if I still have a fever. I can't afford to take any time off. I really need to get some of the heavier things moved over the weekend too. Ugh, of all the times to get the flu!
(Hmm, I may end up swapping the LR and BR, depending on how my furnishings fit). Oh, and this is a bit about the neighborhood where I'll be living, along with some now/then images. Pretty nifty! *groans and gets back in bed*
Happy, happy, joy, joy!!!!
*does the cabbage patch!*
My new landlord just brought the keys to my new apartment to me at my office. He didn't have to do that; how nice of him! He said, “welcome back home” when he handed them to me. Eeee!!!! I'm jingling these in my hand, absolutely delighted and desperately wishing I could stay there from now on, beginning tonight. (That is how glad I am to be leaving SoBro and getting back to my beloved Village.) Maybe if I keep rubbing the keys and chanting or something…? ;) At least this makes hauling all my junk over there a little easier since we can do a bit at a time each day. (Oh no, my guy sprained his wrist and won't be much help with heavy stuff. Fook!)
Now the mostest un-funnest partT is: I need to set aside some serious money..
I have an appointment tonight after work, and if I get out early enough, I'm going to try to take pictures of the new place before I put anything in it so you can see what it looks like before and after. I should measure for carpet while I'm there too. Whew, I'm officially busy! I'm doing a Streaming Camshow on CW Wednesday, hunting for boxes and packing Thursday, spending the weekend at Thee Boyfriend's, then packing/moving things all the next week. I hate having something to do every night, even though it does make time fly. I'm going to need to do some serious vegging once I'm all moved in- new site layout be damned. (You can tell where my priorities are though, because the day I signed my lease, I scheduled my cable [internet] appointment way ahead – almost a month ago, so I won't have any downtime at all, haha! Loser!) I'm so excited, I'm not going to be able to sleep! This is like fucking Christmas! Well, not actually *fucking* it… but I would, if that could get all this done quicker! :D
Beer; it's what's for dinner
Samuel Adams just introduced a new “beer,” meant to be an after dinner drink. It is 50 proof (25% alcohol) and non-carbonated. Judging by my list of favourites (Jubel, Champagne Velvet Bock, DAB, Franziskaner, Hacker Pschorr, Paulaner, Oberdorfer, [Belhaven] St Andrews Scotch Ale, Pyramid Apricot Ale, and Guinness), it's not terribly likely I'll love this one, but, hey, I'll try anything once!
I don't really drink hard liquor much, but when I do it is usually gin (a rickey, fizz, or very dry dirty martini). I like wine, though generally with food, and namely reds (ie Chianti and Cabernet – a Greek vino, Skouras, is a new preference). Ha, now I want a drink, great! *g*
Who's Going? Who's Not?
I won't be able to make the trip to Vegas August 8th-11th for the follow-up work on the CamGirlsT Documentary. I'd like to… love to, actually, but I can't afford to take the time off from work, and I don't have any vacation days available then. (I *really need* every single cent of every itty bitty paycheck in order to catch up the bills I've been putting off lately so that I would be able to move this month. My utilities aren't in danger of being shut off yet, but I have to be very careful for a while. ) The frustrating part is that I would have two whole weeks available for use the following week, ARGH!!! Unfortunately, the crew is already locked into those dates, so… fucked am I. < / yoda >
I still plan to visit for a long weekend in the winter though- to get a break from the snow and cold here. (I was planning to go last year, but my office cut our hours unexpectedly, so it suddently wasn't financially possible.) My sister, Jo, lives there, which saves me hotel and meal costs, leaving airfare and spending money up to me. (She even said she'd help me out with my ticket this time, if need be, so I won't have to miss out again.) I want to see <3 Rachael's boobs <3, and I'd also like to meet Pug, Ariel, Ravenlace (lap dance, please?!), Sarahcide, and Jensex. Hmm, am I forgetting anyone?
Speaking of forgetting, it's been over 10 years since I've lived there and I know everything has changed. (My favourite hotel, for example, Vegas World? – the one with all the neon planets on it, is long gone. I wonder if the record store I worked at, Underground, is gone too. *sniffle*) I'm pretty sure I won't remember my way around. I'll be staying somewhere on Sweeney Ave, but where that is in relation to anything else, I couldn't tell ya. Once my trip is scheduled, I'll be sure to mention it. It is a long way off, I know. I always like to have something to look forward to though, if you couldn't tell :)
Huh?
Back after a long weekend, and already dreaming of a vacation ;) Sephora & Korres Natural Products are giving away a trip to Greece. Reading the official rules and restrictions, I noticed an odd requirement:
If the selected winner is a Canadian resident, before being finally declared a winner, he/she must correctly answer, unaided, a time-limited, mathmatical skill-testing question to be administered by e-mail or telephone.
What?! Why?!
I've entered a lot of sweepstakes before, but this is the first time I've seen a qualifier like that. Not only do I fail to see the need for it, but I don't understand why they are singled out. (I'm not sure I like the subtle implication therein.) Canadians, is this sort of thing common? *scratches head*
EDIT 7/5/05 5:43pm - Thanks for clarifying, folks. I was baffled as to why math skills would have been a issue… wondering if perhaps they were concerned about currency conversion or something. Glad to hear this isn't a case of the American Superiority Complex™ rearing its ugly head again, or least, not that we know of ;)
Damn, damn, damn.
Just heard on the news: Justice Sandra Day O'Connor stepped down from the Supreme Court. It was very unexpected (though she's getting up there in her years and her husband is ill). It was believed Renquist would be vacating very soon since he has cancer.
This is a huge blow, because she was what you might call a swing voter- the most moderate of the group. Now, President Bush can appoint someone to take her place (perhaps 2 someones if Renquist does indeed give notice as well before they resume session in October) and the senate will duke it out over the candidate. She'll serve until a new justice is confirmed. Names for replacement are being thrown around already… such as Atty Gen Alberto Gonzales, who is responsible for the lovely Title 18 2257 mess and known as a devout Pro-lifer. (The decision of Roe V Wade and the subsequent near-reversal were both 5-4 decisions for the Supreme Court. If only one pro-choice judge [which O'Connor was] is replaced with one of anti-choice persuasions [as is expected from the current administration] the decision could easily be overturned, and it's goodbye reproductive freedom, ladies.) The thought of an even more conservative Supreme Court makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up.